Special Days

Yesterday I was surfing Instagram and went through a random Father’s Day hamper post. While checking the post a comment caught my attention. The comment read “Celebrating one day as father’s day is all drama. You should respect your parents every day. This is all western culture.” And this is how I got the idea of writing this blog.

Birthdays, Anniversaries, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Friendship Day and the list goes on. These days mark a special celebration. And celebration is different for everyone. For some it may be spending the whole day with the loved ones, or it can be doing something special for their loved one, some may organize a surprise, some may buy gifts. There are many ways of celebrating.

Well, this is not the first time I came across this thought. Many people feel the same. Now the first and the foremost thing is, the things we do, cannot be based on what culture it belongs to. If you feel happy doing a particular thing, do it. No matter what the origin is. So, celebrating these days can be a western culture but what’s wrong with celebrating if it is spreading smiles and happiness. At the end of the day, no matter what culture we follow we all are human beings and humanity is what connects us all.

Secondly, there’s a difference between respect and celebration. Respect is a feeling that lies in the heart. It can be for parents, for a partner, for friends etc. And celebration is kind of having fun. Now someone who is disrespecting their parents throughout the year and celebrating parents day or their birthdays and pampering them can be quite objectionable.

Now my next sentence is for people who may have jumbled up with the two words ‘respect’ and ‘celebration’. Disrespecting someone and having arguments or differences of opinion are also two different things. Like we fight with our parents or partner but that does not mean we do not respect them. We do have immense respect but an argument is just expressing our difference of opinions. But for example, in a relationship of husband and wife there’s domestic violence. The wife is beaten every day. And she gets a day off from the violence on their anniversary or valentine’s day is what creates a problem. In this case, respect is absent.

Or in another scenario, if you choose to sit and play games or surf the internet or watch TV instead of being a helping hand to your mother and you suddenly decide to make your mother feel special on mother’s day or her birthday and tell her to rest for that one day and take the responsibilities of the household chores, then you need to think about your actions. Because she would be happier if you decide to cut down your chill time and help her out with her chores.

So these special days are just a means of celebrating your special relationships. You can celebrate it on selective days but you have to nurture it on a daily basis. Like having conversations, spending quality time, being there at times of need, regular telephonic conversations, giggling chats etc. My parents usually eat home-cooked food. So, I take them for dinner or lunch dates on special occasions which makes them happy and that’s our kind of celebration. We don’t bring cakes daily but we do love to eat them. So it’s perfectly alright to bring a cake on friendship day and have fun with your gang. It’s romantic to give a bouquet of roses to your loved one on valentine’s or anniversary. It’s nice to give gifts to your loved ones on some silly occasions too.

I agree materialistic things are not important. But trust me they are treasures when seen as a memory. I have a big box containing all the material things that are close to my heart. And whenever I open that box my heart jumps with happiness. Like the first handmade greeting card I gave my mother on her birthday when I was in 4th Std. The first phone that my father gifted me. Some special gifts given by friends, some letters written by some friends. I have gifts given by people with whom I am not in contact anymore. And all those things take me back to those amazing moments I had in my life. Gifts are not a materialistic thing. There are feelings and love attached to it. And you can keep them treasured for a lifetime just as you keep special moments treasured in your heart.

I see some couples celebrating one month, two month anniversaries and so on. Me being a highly celebration loving person I always adore such couples but at times I hear people saying “Ohhh that’s so pathetic and dramatic. Who celebrates months? Who has so much of an ideal time to keep doing these silly things” and so on. If you, my dear reader, are one such kind of a person, a single change in your thoughts would make the vibes around and within you positive. Just imagine saying “Ohhh it’s good that they are happy and celebrating their love, it’s just that I am not that kind of a person”.

The most important thing is to spread love. To be happy in others happiness. You may not believe in celebrating these special days which is fine, but one should also not look down on such celebrations. It’s like a two-way process. You cannot call a celebration lover an over- enthusiast or dramatic person nor can you call a non-celebrator person apathetic or boring. It’s just the choice that matters. And one can go easy on themselves by respecting others choices and understanding that one’s choice does not have to be a globally accepted rule.

What are your thoughts on these special days? Do share in the comments section.